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[ll cool j]
yeah i like that guitar man, yeah
yo e-love i like the way you flipped that guitar man
knahmsayin? it was a good idea man, knahmsayin? yeah
it's kinda like freakin me, yaknahmsayin?
i wanna get hype man, i wanna do this, yaknahmsayin?
just gon' chill, check it out
Slick as vasoline, smell good as cologne
i'm like a muscle man in jail -- they leave me alone
i rhyme like superman, you rap like jimmy olson
i break you like a bottle of green golden molson
you ain't a real rhymer, you look like a actress
how you gon' sleep on me holmes, do i look like a mattress?
am i that old, do i walk like grady?
i'ma hundred-fifty proof, smirnoff is only 80
don't you ever try to rock my house
i'm a real cool cat, know what i'm sayin mickey mouse?
the poetry specialist, so take a dose of this
now think about it -- can you really come close to this?
you soft as powder, weak as a cabin cooler
ugly as work shoes, messin with the ruler:
the ultimate writer reciter and def entertainer
i work myself harder than a boxer's trainer
Chorus: ll cool j
Clap your hands everybody (aiyyo)
and everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)
clap your hands everybody (aiyyo)
and everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)
i said, clap your hands everybody (aiyyo)
and everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)
clap your hands everybody (aiyyo)
and everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)
[ll cool j]
you end up, underneath my sneaker
you're dog doo-doo, i'm watchin you get weaker
you can't believe, the skill and dexterity
ll cool j, and the j is for jeremy
so buff me, james todd the earthquaker
that's right my brother, you're goin out like sega
{*censored*} chewed, so whassup dude?
one of my battles'll get your girlies in the mood
sucker mc's really make me sick
i'm so bad, i can suck my own {dick}
if you go to your girl's house and i'm there already
don't go crazy cause my name ain't eddie
rhymes so rough, it's like a course in trigonometry
when einstein was talkin, he was talkin bout me
the prince of the earth, and i'ma give birth
to a rhyme so hard you look soft as a smurf
gigglin and wigglin, so how we goin out?
lovely, and that's without a doubt!
Chorus 3/4x
[ll cool j]
rappers are my servants, they serve me like an emperor
when i'm through, you'll need a nurse to take your temperature
and cool you down, cause you're cold as leftovers
not the ones on the table, i'm talkin about ruff rovers
you can't get over -- what's my name, goofy?
you smoke i'm no joke, so my brother break out the looseys
and take a pull, cause the buck stops here
i get swift as a magician, wreck {shit} and dissapear
don't cross me, or lose your loyalty
to the prince of the rap court, i'm royalty
and it ain't no puzzle, it's a shame how rappers guzzle
paragraphs i put together so i carry a muzzle
to shut em up and cut em up and make em be quiet
i'm a one man riot, so don't even try it
the prince of special tactics, plus i'm athletic
before you play your hand you better do some calisthetics
jumpin jacks, squats, push-ups, the whole nine
speak your piece, then i'ma go for mine
and i guarantee you, i'm gonna strike again
i recommend my friend you drop the pen and give in
cop out to one rhyme cause you're facin ten
i ain't sidney poitier but we can 'do this again'
i'm nice wit mines, and i gotta admit it
you don't really wanna battle, why don'tcha just forget it!
Chorus 1/2
[ll cool j]
but if you're hard headed and you still don't understand
here's a little sample -- ehm ehm, my man
*brrrrrrring* "hello?"
{*cut n scratch "cool j"*}
".. takes everything you've got" -> cheers (theme song)
{*cut n scratch "pushin a broom"*}
".. sure would help a lot" -> cheers (theme song)
[ll cool j]
check my stats, how we livin, i thought so
i'm fresh, oh yes, but can they flow, hell no
my rhymes are up to date, excellent, on point
i'm tellin you, they're the serious joint
i eat my steak fast, i drink my brew slow
my voice is milky with a nice clear flow
i eat like a fat man, and walk like a gigolo
i'm not a ballplayer, so now y'know!
Clap your hands everybody (aiyyo)
and everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)
cause i rock the house, everybody (aiyyo)
and everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)
Knowhati'msayin? and i'ma be straight til the year 3000
that's word to mother, knahmsayin?
and i say mother with a v cause the v is for victory yaknahmsayin?
cause i'm the victor in this game, word up
knahmsayin? that's what time it is, peace
{*crew applause*}
that man, he sure is funky funky funky
funky! funky, he sho' is!
you best believe he's funky!
you didn't know??? funky!

LL Cool J


LL Cool J

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